THE ALL-NEW GIBSON GARAGE MIAMI is NOW OPEN! Let's talk about it!

0:04 Hey, you're listening to The Adventure. I'm W4CY. We're here. Yo, it's the Pipe Man, and here I am. All right, man. I just got back from a great event yesterday. I still can't breathe. I still am, like, ugh. Festival fluid it's the real deal, but I'm here to tell you about something new in Miami I was in Miami yesterday a special press invite and man it was awesome so studio not come on with me because I really need my Latino partner here because I was in Miami and half of the event was in Spanish and because we had Latino performers there. So it was pretty cool. And it's Miami, anyway. English is the second language. So maybe you could be my translator today.

1:12 I would try. So anyway, yeah. So I got this email last week, I think it was. And it was about this private media event. I couldn't really talk about it until today. And I went there. I had to drive in the morning in rush hour traffic. Do you know what it's like to get to Miami in the morning during rush hour? I do. There's no rush about it. No. I think rush hour is the most ironic name for it.

1:52 I know, right? When you're driving in Miami, you have to First of all, make sure you have 100% of your paying attention on driving. Because there's construction everywhere. Drivers are the worst idiots anywhere. And you got to curve around and avoid stuff. And then you have all those elevated roads. I hate those. Those bug me out a little bit. And they're everywhere there. And like, if you blink, you miss where you have to go, you know, it's, it's, it almost happened to me. And I can tell you at least 10 cars try to drive right into me because they just like, they don't care. They just like move over, you know?

2:46 And it's kind of like that meme. I turn now. Good luck, everyone. Right? Like, Oh my God. But, Where I had to go was really cool. So, do you know the name Gibson? I mean, without a last name, no. Oh, my God. Come on. Which Gibson? There's a lot of Gibsons. Are you Rebel? Like, what the hell? Gibson Guitars. No. This is one of the most famous names in guitars. Obviously, you're not a musician. Obviously, you don't even know what music is. Because you don't know about the Les Paul.

3:30 It's like one of the most famous guitars ever. But anyway. Well, I'm used to the Fenders of the world. Well, shh. We're not talking about Fender here, okay? They suck. But Gibson is killer. And Gibson does a lot for the Latin community. Obviously, because there were Latin artists there. Okay, so basically, they've been opening these garages. It's called garages. It's a retail location. And so they've been talking about it for years here in Miami. It finally came to fruition. The Gibson Garage Miami is open today. Today is the first day. That's why I had to keep it quiet.

4:17 Because yesterday... was a private media invite so they could do the ribbon cutting, they could have announcements about it so the media could check out the place, and they even had artists' appearances, like Nico from, do you know what band he's from? He's Argentinian. Does that help you? Not at all, no. I didn't think you would know, and I didn't expect you to, but I just thought it was fun to do that. Nico from the Black Crows. You know the Black Crows, right? Just the animal.

4:57 What's wrong with you? Okay, so I'm going to do a test here. Instead of you playing it literally on the show so that YouTube will be like, flag, flag. Flag on the play. I'm going to play it on my phone and see if it happens still. I'll bet you if I play this first song, you will recognize it. Are you ready? I am ready. I am ready.

5:44 Okay, that's enough before YouTube gets mad at me. Yeah, I have never heard that song before. Oh, well, fuck you. Okay, so he was there playing. Oh, my God, he was awesome. All right, so I got something else I'm going to play for you. Let's see if you've ever heard this, because this artist was there, too. And, oh, my God, she was so cool. And she... She was so into everything. She was walking around the store picking up swag everywhere. Like, I love it. Okay, so ready? Okay, let's see if you know this. I'm going to bet you don't.

6:35 I can tell by the puzzled look on your face. That's a Gibson guitar right there. Wait, that's not her. That is her, but that's with a feature. Let's go to another one. Yeah, you don't know. I can tell. It's Grace Potter. I like my girls with bad intentions.

7:15 Oh, yeah? Well, she has some bad intentions, I'm sure, but in a good way. And the mayor of Miami was there. All the Gibson leadership was there. And then... Okay, so... There were also... I have to remember because it was in Latin. No, in Spanish. No, but... There was... Do you know who Luis Fonsi is? Yes, I do. And you know Sergio, I hope I pronounce it right, Balin? No. Mana. Mana. Mana. Yes, I know Mana. Yeah, so they were there, okay? So when they were talking in like the question and answer thing, They were talking in Spanish. The only one that didn't talk in Spanish was Grace Potter, but even Nico was talking in Spanish.

8:10 So they basically had like Grammy award winning Latin artists there. And of course, Mana is like huge, as you know. I'm glad. See, I'm glad I had you on because you finally there was somebody you knew, you know. I think you just don't like gringo music is what it is. I mean, I don't listen to their music either, but I know who they are. Okay. Well, I should hope so. They're your people. No, I'm just kidding, but they are pretty well known. So let me tell you though, besides the great performances, besides the cool ribbon cutting, besides the fact that, you know, and, Everything that went on there, they really did have some good, you know, grapes. No, I'm just kidding, because they had hors d'oeuvres there and champagne, and they had this coffee machine.

9:10 But more importantly, I walked into this place. Okay, it's in the Artist District of Miami. There's some cool graffiti around. But this place was, oh, my God, it was amazing. It's 8,000 square feet. It's huge. And so they have this thing where they have a, I think there's like 1500 guitars there, uh, or something like that. Um, or maybe it was more like 500, something like that. I don't know, but there were a lot. Okay. Some of the guitars were really freaking cool. And then they had guitars like on display that you couldn't touch that are just worth a lot. They're like these amazing one-of-a-kind things.

9:59 They had some guitars that had art on them that were really, really cool. That's a new thing they're doing. What is it called? It's the Wynwood Art District is where it was at. So you have a lot of Wynwood artists that were painting these guitars. But they had this thing at the top at the ceiling. It was like a whole, like, that's probably where the 500 guitars are. And it was on like a, I don't know, how do I explain it? It's like when you're at a factory and they have the production line, it was a thing that was circling around the whole, almost like a race car track or a train track.

10:45 Like a conveyor belt? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But they were hanging. And it was just like going around the whole building and then it would disappear into the back and then come back out again. It was like Christmas, man. It was so cool. And they just had so many cool guitars in different rooms with different types of guitars. And, you know, they had the Les Paul, which is one of the most famous guitars ever. And then all this swag. They had some cool swag there for sure. It was just so... This store was amazing. I'm like, I have to bring my grandson back to the store because I always bring him to the guitar center.

11:27 You know, I bought him guitars and other instruments. I'm like, oh, I need to bring my grandson down here because he would be like in heaven. And you know what a professional organization Gibson is, man. It's amazing what they're doing. And the fact that in a time where retail stores are closing... They're opening up these garages all over the country. And it's way cool where you can just go to their retail store and buy a Gibson guitar. You don't have to go to a third party. And so that's where I was yesterday. And, man, it was super cool.

12:07 Super duper cool. So what do you think so far? Do you want to go buy a guitar now? If I go and I start playing Stairway to Heaven, will I get kicked out? No. Do you know how to play Stairway to Heaven? No. Then you might get kicked out because you might suck. It's like, sir, you're offending the customers. I know, right? So for anybody that doesn't know where this is, okay, it is at 2660 Northwest 3rd Ave. on the ground floor of Wynwood Garage, which is where I parked, in Miami's Wynwood Art District. It is cool there.

12:54 And they are open seven days a week, Monday through Saturday, 11 to 7, Sunday 12 to 6. And I just want to say that what they've done with this, even the mayor was like so excited about this. And what it's bringing to the community. And bringing music and more art to the community of Miami. Because there's so much of it there, especially the Latin music. And so, basically, this was created as the ultimate guitar experience. And it was. I was ready to buy a few of them. And I suck at guitar. But there were such cool ones.

13:40 It has the full Gibson family of brands. So, like, you go to places like Guitar Center, you're not going to see all the Gibsons there are. You'll get what they have. Here, you can check out the full family of the brand. And, you know, basically offering, like I said, over 500 instruments from Gibson, Epiphone, Kramer, Mesa Boogie, Maestro, KRK, And the Gibson Amblin Fires. Like I said, 8,000 square feet. You know how big 8,000 square feet is? I guess not. I'm guessing 8,000 square feet.

14:22 Yeah. It's a little bigger than the studio, I can tell you that. Just a little bit. And you forgot to turn the on-air light on again. Oops. I guess we're not on air. If that light's not on, does that mean we're not really live? That's what I want, though. We are, but we're on incognito mode. So here's what you can do. Let me ask you a question. Do you consider yourself a musician or a fan or a collector or multiple of those? When it comes to music, I am more of a musician than a fan.

15:05 What do you play? Like the recorder or something? The triangle. I'm really good at that one. It's funny you should say that because I was in the orchestra in school when I was a kid and I was in the percussion section. That's when the instruments I had to play was the triangle and the xylophone and the bells and the timpani. I love timpani. That's those big kettle drums. You know, the congas, the bongos, the snare, the bass. I used to be upset because, like, give me a drum set. I don't want to pay all these separate things. But I did like playing the separate things. Most of what I play is just guitar and drums.

15:48 Okay, so you don't know how to play Stairway to Heaven. What do you know how to play on guitar? Well, I usually just play acoustic. I don't play electric. But, yeah, there are songs that are acoustic. So are you trying to say to me that you just... play it, and you're not even playing anything? Is that what you're trying to say? Well, if you give me the sheet music, I can play it. Oh, so you know how to make sheet music, huh? I don't know which songs I'm playing. Just give me the sheet music and a tempo, and I'll play it. And what about drums? Drums, I just play by ear. Whatever comes, whatever feels natural, whatever.

16:31 I am considering getting one of those electronic drum sets so I can put the headphones on. I thought they were lame because I played drums for nine years, and it just looks like practice pads to me, and I hated practice pads. Oh, my God. That's why I quit drums. I was so sick of those practice pads. But I was on Shiprocked, and I played one, and you put the headphones on, And it's like you're really playing the drums when you put those headphones on. Like, if you don't have the headphones, it's stupid. But once you put the headphones on, it's like, oh my God, it's so much fun. It's like really playing the drums. So, basically, Gibson Garage Miami invites musicians, fans, collectors, curious beginners to play, explore, create, and connect through hands-on experiences with live performances, artist events, exclusive apparel, lifestyle gifts, rare instruments, local Miami-inspired collaborations, and the first, the first stateside Gibson Gallery art installation. And I saw that, and it was really cool. I'm not going to tell you what's there, because you've got to go there and see it for yourself. But it was badass. Uh, you know, if you go there, if you're a guest of Gibson, you can go there and work with the

18:03 Gibson garage pros through the Gibson custom made to measure program to design a fully personalized guitar handcrafted by Gibson custom artisans in Nashville. I need the pipe man guitar. I have the pipe man surfboard. Now I need the pipe man guitar. That just gave me an idea. I'm going to have to reach out to a publicist and say, I need a Pipe Man guitar. And then I'll learn how to play it. The Pipe Tar. The Pipe Tar. It's like a keytar, but a Pipe Tar. And so, yeah. It is killer. It's a killer. It's just, oh my God, I can't wait to go back. It's so cool. And So they have had other openings. Nashville is the flagship store. They have a second one in London.

19:01 And now Miami marks a new chapter in Gibson's growing global garage footprint and celebrates the spirit, sound, and creative energy of Miami. Why was Gloria Estefan not there? That's what I want to know. Oh, she doesn't play guitar. So never mind. We don't want singers. We want guitar players. Okay, so everybody, you need to follow Gibson Garage Miami on social media and visit gibson.com. Okay, I do have to say something to you, too. You said you don't even know Gibson, so do you want me to tell you about Gibson, Juan?

19:43 Sure. I'm going to actually go right off of what their actual bio. Gibson, the leading iconic guitar brand, has shaped the sounds of generations of musicians and music lovers across genres for over 130 years. Do you know what that means, Juan? That means it's older than the two of us combined. Founded in 1894 and headquartered in Nashville, Tennessee, Gibson has a legacy of world-class craftsmanship, legendary music partnerships, and progressive product evolution that is unrivaled among musical instrument companies. The Gibson portfolio includes Gibson, the leading guitar brand, as well as many of the most beloved and recognizable music brands, including Epiphone, which has been on every stage since 1873, Kramer, the original made-to-rock hard guitar, and Mesa Boogie, the home of tone, KRK, behind great music for over 30 years, and Maestro, the founder of effect pedals. Gibson has dedicated to quality, innovation, and sound excellence so that music lovers for generations to come will continue to experience music shaped

21:17 by all Gibson brands. Explore more at Gibson.com, the Gibson app, and on Gibson TV. And don't forget to follow them on, you know, Instagram, X, and everything else. Now, I have a real important question for you, okay? Okay? Oh, and don't forget, go visit. Now I have to go visit the Gibson Garage in Nashville and in London. I wish I knew about it when I was just at Bloodstock. I'm going to do it next year. Okay, but here's the best part right here. I did read that bio right now. I did not have it memorized. I don't even know if I've ever read it before. I wish Rebel was on with us so I could have made her read it, because that would have been entertaining.

22:09 Would have taken the entire hour. Now, I want to see if the sunglasses really work, because I don't know if people realize why I wear the shades. I wear them for a few reasons. I wear them because I'm in my 50s, and that's almost a requirement when you're in your 50s. Secondly, because let me ask you, Juan, you were watching Could you tell I was reading anything? No. And what I was reading was to the right of me. So you didn't see my eyes move. No matter where I look, I'm looking at the camera. That's the trick folks. And so if you ever wonder why I'm always wearing these, well, it's part of my look. It's part of my trademark.

22:53 I actually have a red pair now. Okay. Because my hair is red. I can't see shit out of those. Okay. They are so weird. They look cool because they match my hair cool, but oh my God, I'm going to have to show you when you're not sick and I'm in the studio. I did come by the studio yesterday, but I knew you were sick, so I did not walk in. It's kind of cool at our studio that we have a drive-through mailbox. Yeah. We didn't have that at the other one, but I literally drive up and roll down the window and get down there. Everybody does that. They'll go and get in their car and then go around the building instead of just walking up to it.

23:37 Yeah, see, I'll walk up to it when I'm actually there. But if I'm not going inside, that's what I do. But it's kind of cool, actually. But where are... I would go get the red... You know what? Maybe I should go get the red ones. And so you could see. But it's so weird. Like, First of all, it doesn't really block the sun. And everything, like when I'm looking, if I were looking at the screen right now, it'd be like looking at a red tinted black and white picture. Like if I look, everything's like almost black and white when I look at it. Or you can't see certain things.

24:20 Or when I look at my phone, it's a trip. Because if I look at my phone, you know where you have the notifications? It just is a dot. It's like really weird. Well, that's because anything with a screen has blue light and the red counterbalances the blue light. So it kind of cancels it out. That's why you see it as a red tinted black and white. Exactly. And you know what? So it's interesting because, you know, what happened was, is I broke another one of these. I keep breaking these when I go to festivals. I have my endless supply. And so I broke them on the airplane. And when I got off, I saw these red glasses that were just like these, and I'm like, well, I have red hair. I had thought about it anyway because I've always matched my hair to my sunglasses. But it was annoying most of the time. They are annoying to wear. Even driving, I can't drive with them. It's horrible.

25:23 But they look cool. So you got to sacrifice your vision to look cool. You know, that's the way I kind of look at it. And now we know how Ozzy felt. Well, maybe his weren't like that. I don't know. But he did wear some that were kind of reddish. And these here, which he wore these to, these were weird to me at first, but now I'm used to them. But they're not as bad. And actually, these... Like, I can read notes while I'm doing the show easier with these than any other sunglasses. It's like looking through regular glasses or whatever. You know? But other things can be kind of weird. When I first got them, I never wore them until Aussie Pass. That's when I started wearing them.

26:13 But I'm used to it now. But those red, I don't think I'll ever get used to it. But here's what I found out, too. You know, actually... The red ones are better for your eyes, especially when you're doing technology. So I guess it is okay. They filter out the blue light. So here's what we're going to do, okay? I am going to, I think I'll do it the easy way. I'm going to go get my red shades so I can put them on. Maybe for the rest of the show, I don't know. So you can see. Because, I don't know, the red and the blue kind of looks weird, too. Like, I almost look like Joker with the red and the blue.

26:55 But we're going to play a couple commercials. That'll give me enough time to get them. And these are the last two. Well, we don't know that yet. There could be others that come up. But the last two scheduled stops on the Pipe Man Radio Tour for 2026. I'm sure there might be more, though, ended up. But next week, I'm going louder than life. Badass. And I actually have interviews at Louder Than Life of bands I've never interviewed before. They're big bands. I'm like, whoa, that doesn't happen often anymore. Usually, it's like I'm interviewing a lot of the bands I've interviewed before. And... Then after that, the beginning of October, right before my birthday, it used to be on my birthday all the time, is Aftershock, and I love that festival too. So I just got my approval for that yesterday while I was at Gibson. So I'm looking forward to both these festivals, but I do still have a couple tickets I can give away for Aftershock. So reach out to me on Pipeman Radio on all socials and tell me why you should win Aftershock, and also put in your vote whether you like the blue shades or the red shades better. So, what I want you to do, Juan, is roll those two commercials while I go get the

28:25 red shades and do my, what is it? I can't believe I'm drawing a blank here. My apparel change, my whatever it is. I'm doing my change. My confirmation. I was going to say confirmation. My I was going to say confirmation, but I'm Jewish. I don't do confirmations. So go for it, Ron. Plus Pantera, Pierce. The Veil, Gojira, Papa Roach, and more. Nearly 200 bands across seven stages. Louder Than Life at the Kentucky Expo Center, September 17th through 20th. Passes are on sale now, starting at only $ 1 down at louderthanlifefestival.com. Aftershock, the West Coast's largest rock, metal, and punk festival returns to Sacramento this October with My Chemical Romance, Tool, Limp Bizkit, Pierce the Veil, plus Suicide.

29:38 Boys, Queens of the Stone Age, The Offspring. A Day to Remember. Wu-Tang Clan and more. Aftershock. October 1st through 4th. Passes are on sale now. Starting at only $ 1 down at aftershockfestival.com. I can't believe Wu-Tang Clan. I have to get them. Actually, I have a friend that used to be part of them. I'm going to message her. And tell her maybe she should come to Aftershock with me. See, now, I have them on now. My whole room here looks red. The screen looks red but black and white. Like a little combo of both. Actually, I can kind of see my notes now. So maybe I'm getting used to these things. Because I'm on the other day for an interview. I couldn't read anything. I couldn't even read the person's name.

30:26 And so... All right, so what do you think, Juan? What do you think of these? I don't know. I think I'm kind of partial to the blue ones more. Me too. Me too. But if Daredevil could see, he would probably see what you're seeing right now. If who would see what? Daredevil. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There you go. So I just figure it kind of matches the hair. I have to go back to Paris hair on Tuesday. Because from all the sweating red, you know, Slayer was headlining. It was the anniversary of Rain and Blood album. They played the whole album, and I was raining blood down my face because it was so freaking hot. Like, let me tell you something, Juan. Even yesterday, I was like, man, it's so nice and cool out. Like, you know you've been in some really hot places. When you come back to Florida, you're like, it's cool outside.

31:27 But it has been pretty cool in here. Like, right now we're at, what, 86? Yeah. And I'm telling you, like, I'm comfortable. I'm not even hot. It's like, I got off the plane. Usually I get off the plane and you walk out the door of the airport and you get hit with that wall of humidity. And it really does feel like a wall. You're like, oh, get me out of here. I walked out. I was like, oh. What a pleasure. Because it was, I mean, it was brutal at Rock, Oklahoma. It's probably going to be brutal at Latter-day Life, too. I have the festival flu now, and that's the place I get it worse. I'm telling you, I'm stupid, too, because I always bring a gator with me and never wear it because I feel stupid with it on, and I can't breathe.

32:21 But then I can't breathe for days, weeks afterwards anyway, so it's stupid. You know what you should look for? What? You know what you should look for? Like one of those respirators, the KN95 ones. But go on Etsy and find some like steampunk versions of that. Oh. That would be cool. Send me links. Go send me some links and I'll check them out. I will look for it, yeah. It could be just part of my Pipe Man look then. But yeah, the Gators kind of annoy me. I don't like things on my nose like that anyway. So it kind of annoys me. And I feel like I look stupid.

33:03 But then, you know what? And you know me, I don't like to take meds. So, of course, it wasn't until the end that I tried to take an allergy med. It was too late. There was one night I was literally dying. It was so bad. I couldn't even deal. And so, basically... I'm going to try for later in life. I think I'm going to take the allergy meds right before I even go. It doesn't help. No? I do a lot of DIY projects at home and anything that I do with carpentry where I have to cut and stuff like that that kicks up a lot of sawdust. Even if I take an allergy medicine, it doesn't help.

33:48 Well, are you taking it after or before? Before. Like hours before. I'm going to try, though, because you know what? I don't want to feel like this all the way through till after aftershock. That's like a month, you know, and I hate this. I couldn't breathe when I was a kid, so this is like PTSD for me because I had a really bad deviated septum, so I literally, I couldn't breathe at all through my nose, like nothing. If you held my mouth like this, like literally nothing, zero. So, I don't like living like that now. But, yeah. So, let's see. Red or blue?

34:39 I think you should wear them like that. Yeah, that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to do it like this now. Okay. Oh, speaking of Joker. When you wear them like that, do you see everything in 3D? Um, no. I don't. Maybe if I do this, oh, then it's like really dark. It's really evil. It's the red with the blue over it that makes you evil. So, or we could do, or the cool look could be this. We'll do this and then this. So we still have the red sunglasses with the red hair. Whoops. There it is.

35:29 All right, just like that. That's my new look right now. That's the new Pipe Man look. By the way, did you know that I have a... Oh, I have to wear that now. I'm going to have to find it. I have a shirt from the beginning of the network that was my Adventures of Pipe Man shirt. You've seen the logo, right? With me in this blue suit with the red mohawk. Right, yeah. Because originally I started with red hair and then I went to blue. And now I'm back to red. But, you know. I have to get touched up by Paris Air. I just reached out to him yesterday. Because he did it before I left.

36:10 He's right over here on North Lake. What a nice dude. Like, when you go into this hair salon, he... And everybody there is so nice. He has his niece there. Oh, my God, she's like him. She's a Spanish with the niceness. And they're all from the UK. The mother's there. They're all super nice. And he just knows how to make you feel really, really good. Like, he's a real positive person. So it's like, you know, oh, man, you're looking like a rock star now. And he does make you need a salon like that where you come out of there. You could have the shittiest haircut in the world and you feel like a million dollars, okay?

36:54 It's like therapy. But he went a little overboard, but I like it because I was trying to lean back in. I didn't want to go totally. So I was like, I want the red, but just do a couple streaks. I want it to be subtle. Obviously, it's not subtle. And I don't know if you saw it the first day I got it done. Did you see it? I did, yeah. During one of the interviews that you did. Yeah, and so it's not subtle at all. But now, you know, with all that swaying stuff, it is fade, so it's like a different type of red. The red's there, but it's more like a... What is that color? The rust color. It's like that rust color now, I think.

37:39 So I reached out to him yesterday, which is more notice than I normally give him. And I was like, yeah... I need a touch up of the red. I need it done on Tuesday. And he goes, can you do Wednesday? I'm like, no, I'm flying out early Wednesday morning. He's like, can you do Saturday? And I'm like, no, that's too far away. I need it fresh for the festival. It has to be right before the festival. So Tuesday at three, I'll be at Paris Salon. You can come visit me there, but then you have to get your hair done. Just saying, you know, Come visit me at Paris Salon on North Lake Boulevard Tuesday, 3 o'clock. But be prepared to make your appointment for your hair if you want to come there. So, interviews. Okay, so I had an interview today. Pay attention, people. During the next few days at 1 p.m., live show. I'm going to be broadcasting some of the interviews lately. Uh, we just did an interview with a great band today.

38:49 That's going to be coming out. I did an interview also with this woman. She's from Indonesia and she's Muslim. And this is for the wandering Jew segment of the adventures of pipe man. And we, we, what we really talked about was how Jews and Muslims can get along. Jews and Muslims love each other. It's not the people. That's the problem. It's, The powers that be and the political leaders, that's the problem. They are all paying us all against each other. They're the ones that create the most racism. They're the ones that create the most anti-Semitism. They're the ones that create... the most anti-Muslim stuff. And in this interview, you're going to have to check it out because you're going to have to see how that's not how the real world is. If you want to really know what's going on in the world in Israel, Palestine, Iran, or anywhere else in the world, Get on a freaking plane and go see it because watching the media, all they're doing is spreading fear, hate, and division. We are united.

39:59 If we are humans, one race, a human race, if we all band together instead of falling for their bullshit, we will overtake all these idiots in the world and we could all love each other and all play some Gibson guitar together. around the campfire. There's a good event. Let's have a Gibson guitar playoff around the campfire and a representative from every race and every religion there. Oh, if you can get at least like 20 people playing the same song on acoustic guitars, best sound ever.

40:43 See? See? There you go. Well, you've heard my idea of how to solve all the world's problems, right? What was it? You haven't heard it? The Groupon? No, that doesn't solve the world's problems. It solves your pipe man's problem. Okay? How you solve all the world's problems is with a music festival. It has to be a metal festival, though. A country festival won't work. Because every time there's a country music thing, there's some kind of fight. Okay? Okay? Everybody thinks metalheads are so scary. Listen, when you're in a mosh pit, the biggest rule is when somebody falls, pick them up. And after the mosh pit's over, all these big, scary-looking nudes are all in a group hug.

41:40 And so, I don't know. You never knew Dee. Dee used to work at the station. And she was this short girl... She was like two foot nothing. No, she wasn't that short, but she was, she was somewhere in the fours, I think. And, uh, maybe the low fours. I don't know, but you know, she made you feel tall one. And, uh, so anyway, she was a country redneck girl. In fact, you've heard the demo reel. She's on there telling, telling me how, what, what was that? What was that show? The, uh, The Redneck Show? Do you remember what I'm talking about? Anyway, they were a bunch of rednecks and they were gay bashing. And she's like, she's talking about how they have good family values. I was like, oh, really? So what? You consider good family values seen around the campfire and gay bashing? I don't know.

42:43 That's not what I was brought up as, good family values. Is that the Latin good family values I would like to know? I mean, to have good family values, you have to have a family, right? Well, that's true. That's true. You have to be able to procreate. Well, they do procreate. That's the problem. They probably shouldn't be able to procreate. That's why we have so much inbreeding going on, you know. But, you know, so... There was one week and I had two festivals in one weekend. Welcome to Rockville up in Jacksonville and Fort Rock over in Fort Myers. And I obviously couldn't be at both. So I was assigning her to do coverage at Fort Rock.

43:27 And she had never even been to a rock concert before, much less metal or anything like that. So she was a little scared about it. I'm like, listen, you know what? You go to these country shows where a bunch of rednecks are drinking Jack Daniels. The next thing you know, they're having a fist fight. There was something that happened just recently in the news about that. And I said, but you go to a metal show. Here's what's going to happen. You're going to probably meet a bunch of new friends. Everybody's going to be really nice. And we're like one big family. You'll probably have a new boyfriend.

44:08 And you'll have the best time of your life. So she goes, she comes back, and Monday she's like, oh my God, you were so right. Everybody was so nice. I have all these new friends now. I teabagged some dude, and he's now my boyfriend. And I have this new favorite band. I don't know if you ever heard of them. They're called Bring Me to Horizon. I'm like, yeah, I think I might have heard of them. But see, we like people, the general public. to not really realize that we're not really evil and scary, because then they'll all come and ruin it, just like the rest of the world. There are no outsiders at a metal festival at all.

44:52 And I make so many friends everywhere I am. I have more friends at music festivals around the world than I do right here in Florida, because I just want to tell you, I hope none of the Florinians here There are a bunch of fucking assholes here. Just saying. I don't know. I think the internet would agree with you. I think. Every time there's some weird news or some really out there news, it's always a Florida man. Oh, did you know the news about sex in Florida? No, what is it now? Okay, so first of all, I don't know if it's still law, but I know up until recently it definitely was.

45:40 There's a law in the state of Florida. Okay, you can go buy a gun without any ID and no background check, no psych check, and walk into the South Florida fairgrounds for a gun show and buy a gun and walk out. But you cannot cohabitate with the opposite sex because that's illegal. That used to be, it might still be a law, but that was always a thing. You know, you're talking about a place where that has some of the most immoral shits in Sodom and Gomorrah, but you can't cohabitate with somebody. But here, this is the best one. Only if they're the opposite sex, but if they were gay... Then you could.

46:23 Then you could. Because they don't assume you're doing anything. How old is this law? It's been around forever, but you'll have to look up if it's still a law, but I know it was a law as of several years ago. And when I say several, I don't mean a lot. But here's the other one. I don't know if this has been fixed yet either. But at one point, imagine that you have to do this. They had to make bestiality illegal in Florida. Imagine how sick people are that you have to make a law about something like that. You have to make a law about you have sex with your goat or alligator or whatever. So, our brilliant lawmakers in the state of Florida, when they wrote this law, they worded it wrong, and they outlawed all sex in the state of Florida. So, the place that has the most sexual deviance... It's against the law to have sex. That's why you can't have those laws.

47:31 Okay, so I just looked it up, and it says Flores historical law prohibiting unmarried opposite-sex couples from cohabiting was fully. Cohabitating. It says cohabiting. I don't know why they wrote it like that, but it says it was fully repealed in 2016 and is no longer active or enforceable. Oh, there you go. But that's not that long ago. It was originally enacted in 1868. See? Okay, now look up the law of outlawing bestiality. And Miami doesn't count because Latin people have family values and morals. Do-do-do-do-do-do. Do-do-do-do-do.

48:31 Come on, now. Get it. Get her done, Juan. All right, it's actually under Florida statute 8281.126, which covers sexual activities involving animals. It says... It carries a penalty up to 15 years in prison. It's considered a second-degree felony. It says permitting on-premises. Knowing allowing such acts on-premises under one's control is a third-degree felony. So even if you're not the one doing it, if you're allowing someone to do it, at your house, it's a third degree felony punishable by up to five years in prison.

49:32 Okay. But this one doesn't say when he came into prison. Oh, listen how bad my voice is there. That was a bad weekend. They were just at... I saw them at Warped Tour. Those are the coolest dudes. I think we should close out the show with a song. What do you think, Juan? Sounds good to me. Then close out the show with a song, and then you can hit the outro. But meanwhile, thanks for listening here on The Adventure of Spider-Man W4CY Radio. If you missed any part of this episode, it will be on all my podcasts on iHeart, Pandora, Spotify, Amazon Music, Audible, and like 100 others. It will also be on my YouTube channel and everywhere else. But in the meantime, I think I'm going to have to integrate this right here.

50:42 Or I got to find, I have other ones too. But integrate this into maybe my outro or intro. You'll have to tell me what you think next time, Juan. Are you ready? Ready? I'm going first and you're going second. Thanks for listening, everybody. Tune in tomorrow at 1 p.m. There will be an interview that you will get to see. He's the pipe man. Play that pipe, pipe man. Play that pipe, pipe man. Play that pipe, pipe man.

51:24 Yeah. Pipe man. Funky Pipe on W4CY Radio. What do you think? I'm sorry. I fucked it up, but you were sitting there for a second. You'll tell me later. Let's just run it. Thank you for listening to The Adventures of Pikeman on W4CUI Radio.